Rivers of Milk — The Penn Review

my hair
covered
beneath a thick veil
i was not raised for
being touched

she untangles
my past
through glimpses
of the girl i could have been
such tenderness
terrifies me

i belong to a long line
of mothers
their eyes lowered
but when they were young
they wanted more than
fruit ripening in their bellies
from men

i grew up being told
of holy women
who kept
their family’s honor safe
they dreamt
just
to be free

merciful lord
we conceive
we are split open
our wounds draining into this earth
which you created

my lord
forgive us of the things
in your absence
we cannot bear

i discovered
what i must do
to be forgiven

briefly i knew
in her arms what it felt
to be loved

tiny drops spattered over cotton sheets
i stopped
clinging beads to my fingers
the long afternoon of
prayer abandoned

i was bleeding then
i tell this story now because
the fire still burns
i am waiting for
my life to end

Aiman Tahir Khan is a writer from Lahore, Pakistan. Currently the first Pakistan Youth Poet Laureate in English, her work appears in Wildness, Rust & Moth, and other publications. She works as a poetry reader for Sontag Magazine.