peel out

Christopher Lanyon

I’ve been eating a bag of clementines a day. I googled “how many oranges do you have to eat a day before it kills you?” feeling ambivalent about the answer. One of the things worth living for is eating a bag of clementines a day. I leave a fine spray of sticky juice across my computer screen. My nails and fingertips are turning that sickly nicotine yellow that boys love to write about but this time it’s not cigarettes, it’s eating a bag of clementines a day. This is the kind of shit that people say “well if that’s your only vice then that’s not that bad” about, but this isn’t my only vice I also like cigarettes and tequila and video games and sex and impressing people who give tours of breweries with my superior knowledge of yeast and worrying about my receding hairline and drinking sparkling water by the two liter bottle until I piss every fifteen minutes. But I’m not eating a bag of any of those a day. I’m eating a bag of clementines a day.